Final Moments

Dec. 15, 2009

These are our last few hours here in Costa Rica and the last 24 have been melancholy for me. Jaxon is thrilled to be returning to the Land of Excess and Consumption, but I am not ready. I feel free for the first time in years. Not as free as the 20-somethings I watched with longing as they celebrated finishing their yoga training with a surf trip to Montezuma. Now that is real freedom. That was me, once upon a time. I was overcome by the sensation of time literally flying by as I watched the Costa Rican landscape pass me by out the bus window, and I listened to the girls planning their adventure.

Jaxon had fallen asleep with his hand slightly gripping my arm. He reflexively squeezed and released my arm and I was reminded of how he used to do that to my finger as he was sleeping as an infant. The tears came pouring forth as they are about to again as I write this. Nine years since my baby was born and here we are on our first adventure together. Gosh, he is so big now and his upper body barely fits in my lap.

Tears poured hot down my face as I gazed at the beauty of the mountains, the azure sky and the puffy clouds, the cows on the hill, the boldly painted Tico homes – pink and teal. I thought of my Uncle who just passed away days before our trip and my Dad who died when he was almost the age I am now. I was so sad that they could not share this view or any others with me - grossly aware of how sometimes we do not have as much time as we think we do.

In 2010, I approach my 40^th year and as the landscape blew by me, it reinforced my feeling of how my life is passing me by. How, if I am lucky, I am probably at the halfway point. Given my family history, that may not be the case, but I am a positive person and (mostly) healthy. I hope to live a long life so I can take Jaxon’s kids zip lining with me in Costa Rica and elsewhere to experience the world.
Well, Jaxon is nagging me about his stomach growling, so I must end my Costa Rican journal to take him to breakfast…our last breakfast in Costa Rica. One thing I will not miss is rice and beans, but I have developed a new fondness for fried plantains.

Today, give your kids a big hug. Call your mom, or your dad and tell them you love them. Kiss your spouse on the cheek for no good reason and wrap your arms around them and say thank you for sharing their life with you. Be grateful you have eyes to soak in the beauty around you. Be thankful that you can hear the beautiful sound of laughter and music. Shout out in joy that you can breathe and feel the coolness and freshness of the winter air or the feeling of raindrops on your skin.

Be grateful for each moment of your life, each minute, each second.

I know I am…….

Until our next adventure,
Lisa

OK - think I figured it out! Here are the pics of us working with the animals at the Zoo. If you cannot see them well, click on the slideshow and it will take you to the pictures and you can view them at your leisure. ENJOY!

Los Personnes de Santa Rosa

Tuesday, Dec. 8. 2009

Jaxon and I have worked at the La Marina Zoo and Wildlife Rescue Center for 2 days now. I must say, it is extremely satisfying work. We arrive around 8:30 after taking the bus up the hill, work until about 10 and then go have café with the others who work there. Then we go out for a while more, came back and have a communal lunch at noon and then out again till 3 pm and then we’re done! Today we took the bus to Aguas Zarcas and spent some time in the internet café.

The zoo is not very modern and every animal eats either bananas, plantains, yuca or papaya, so we spent a lot of time preparing fruit. I will give a more specific journal of each day at the zoo for those who are interested. I will try to post a new one each day.

Here’s a little more about our host family. They are all very sweet:

A few more I do not think posted previously! (if you saw these already, let me know!)

A Tree Falls in Tirimbina

Older Photos from Tirimbina that I think Did Not Post!

Costa Rican Wildlife 1

At the new Casa con Rosa y Ronald

Sunday, Dec. 6. 2009

Today I have a bit of a hangover. Another birthday party last night and my new hosts were very successful in never allowing my glass to be empty. I told them I like Pilsen and they made sure I had many. Felt like college again! I don’t usually drink that much (beer that is!)

We arrived here yesterday afternoon. I really do not even know where we are, except to say we are between Aguas Zarcas and Quesada and our house is on the same street as the prison. The accommodations are not bad, but certainly a different standard than most Americans would find acceptable. My threadbare sheets on my single mattress are a combination of floral and 101 Dalmations with a VERY pink satin Asian theme comforter with pagodas. We have separate entrances from the house and a Jack and Jill bathroom that connects this rooms, so it is comfortable. I miss having a little kitchenette and certainly will go a little crazy without wifi, but that I s part of the adventure!

What a different way of living! I am not allowing Jaxon to use his iPod touch because we cannot charge it and I need the translator on it for emergencies. We do not have a TV and there is no internet service. This should be a reality TV show for Americans and their kids! Maybe I should pitch that idea? Like a Wife Swap, but instead have whole families swap lives in a different culture for a week. It would be a hit. Anyone have any connections in Hollywood? I want to do this!

We begin working at the zoo on Monday.. We had a chance to go and walk through it yesterday. Some of it is nice and some of it is very sad. Many of the big cats do not have adequate accommodations – small cinder block cages maybe 10’ x 10’. And neither do the spider monkeys and the parrots. How do I tell them that without sounding judgmental or rude? What could be done to fix it? Throughout the zoo are messages in Spanish and English about conservation and environmentalism, which I think are good. I think most of the animals they have here were obtained from a bad situation (so rescued) and I think they release some that are able to be released, but not many. I think! Again I need to clarify that.

Well, today is Sunday and it is raining (surprise!), but I am sure will pass. I need to get up and shower and make an appearance in the main house for breakfast, lest my hosts think I am dead in here. Feeling a bit fuzzy, like I stubbed my head. Today we do not work, so we may go to the local pool and maybe up to the hot springs that are pretty near by.

Oh - last night Jaxon was hilarious at the party. The lights went out for about a half and hour (no one knows why!) This was a big party with loud music, tons of food about 50 people, etc. We were sitting in the kitchen making strained conversation and Jaxon suggested that there was a guy upstairs that was riding a bike to make the electricity for the lights and that maybe he fell off or had one to many cervesas! I almost fell off my stool laughing. Funny boy!

Moving On....

I am sittting in the lobby of the lounge to write our final post from Tirimbina. We are very sad to be leaving. Tirimbina is a such a warm place and they people who work here are like one big family. They have embraced Jaxon and I, and really made us feel welcome.

I am thinking of trying to come back next year, but leading an educational trip for kids for a week to 10 days. If any of you parents would like to send your children with Matt and I out here for a week, let's talk! I promise it will be the experience of a lifetime for them, as it has been for us. Many educational tours through the rain forest, whitewater rafting, horseback riding, etc., We even know an ex-professional soccer player to teach us soccer! I am working on pricing now, but it would be affordable. Better experience than a summer camp!

So now, we are heading to La Marina Zoo in Aguas Zarcas on the bus. We will be there for 6 nights and then to Arenal (active volcano) for 3 nights where we have arranged a high octane zip line through the canopy where they take you up the mountain in a gondola and you zip line back down! I do not know if I will have internet access or not in Aguas Zarcas, but will defnitely in Arenal. Check back with us every day, just in case!

PURA VIDA, AMIGOS!!!

A Tree Falls in Tirimbina

This morning Jaxon and I accompanied Emanuel on a two and half hour hike through a rustic trail in Tirimbina to do a visual check of some of the plants in a study and to search for caterpillars. Tomorrow begins the week-long butterfly (mariposa) study. Tirimbina has been collecting data on butterflies the first week of each month for about the last five years. All of this cumulative research will be very helpful in studying the health of the forest and the butterfly population.

Slideshow: Monkeys and Mushrooms and Frogs - Oh My!

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Futbol de Costa Rica

Tonight we were invited to go watch the Tirmibina soccer team play a 5 on 5 game. It was SO MUCH fun! The game was played on a small field and moved so quickly. SO much more fun than any pro game I have watched in the States. Tirimbina won 6 to 4. I could watch them play every week! Jaxon is inspired and learned some pretty cool moves.

Afterward we went with some of the team out for a beer, and Jax and I had our first hamburguesa con pappas. (burger with fries) It was pretty darn good!

I think I could live here. I am not quite ready to leave Tirmibina and move on. Oh - we are staying an extra night to work on a butterfly project starting tomorrow. We will leave for La Marina Zoo (where I do not believe we will have wi-fi - AGH!) on Saturday. Tomorrow night we are going to celebrate our friend Carlos's 36th birthday at a celebration at the gym. Feliz Cumpleaños, mi amigo!

I am working on a post with photographs from our amazing day today. Should have it up tomorrow, so check back.

Amor Siempre,
Lisa y Jaxon

Pizza & Beer Tonight - Boring

Ahhh just like home. Except it was REAL ordeal to get a pizza delivered to the lodge - involving one pizza restaurant, 1 lodge receptionist, and a taxi driver - all incredulous that I wanted a pizza with just cheese and sauce! When all was said and done, the pizza the size of the plate cost about $12. I had a beer slushy from our fridge which freezes everything and I finished off the Yippies. I told you I would eat them all - even if they were kind of gross!

Uneventful day today. I am working on developing some rainforest animal cards to use for games at the schools, but almost ended up smashing my laptop in frustration. It has been a while since I had to compose more than an email message or Facebook update. I am not meant to sit behind a computer screen all day (Note to self!) Highlight of the day was watching a 6 foot iguana whiptail down the walking path.

Horseback riding yesterday was a blast! Especially watching Jaxon gallop for the first time. (Rides like his dad - Elbows flopping, holding on for dear life, but laughing ecstatically the whole time!) Starting a butterfly project Thurs. Leaving for next stop Fri. or Sat.

Kind of boring post, but that's it for now. Not everyday is an earthquake kind of day.

La Finca de Dona Daisy (Dona Daisy's Farm)

La Finca de Dona Daisy (Dona Daisy's Farm)

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Waste Now, Want Not Later

I am reminded while living in this little eco-friendly village of how overindulgent we are in the U.S. with our resources. Here there are signs to remind you to turn off the water when you brush your teeth and wash your hands. Here there are recycle bins and compost heaps everywhere. Here they are signs asking you to please shut off your lights and fans when you leave so as not to waste precious resources. Air conditioning is in only a few rooms and turned on only when there is someone occupying it. At the restaurant you eat what you take – no more and no less. To return a plate of uneaten food to the kitchen is rude at best. In the shower you shut off the water while you shave and lather and then turn it back on to not waste water (precious hot water, I may add, which lasts for a minute at a time and is heated through solar.) Here few people have cars and most use bikes, buses and their feet to get where they need to go. Two cars per household in Costa Rica? You must be loaded!!! Here you wash your clothes (often by hand) and hang them in the sun to dry.

Roughing it

def. Tweezing your eyebrows by flashlight with the tweezers from the Swiss Army knife.

White Water Rafting Trip

A Video Crossing the Suspension Bridge

 

View our video of a local turkey!

Click on this link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ic1LdpOyaYY

Con Mucho Gusto - (With Much Thanks) this Thanksgiving

Although we will not be eating a Thanksgiving meal today, we will celebrate our day living with gratitude for each moment, each breath, each smile. Being in a 3rd world country for this day is a real reminder of all of the abundance in our lives. We will celebrate this day by exploring the beauty of this region by raft as we spend the morning traveling down the Sarapiqui.

A Morning in the Life of L & J

(Stay Tuned for the Sequels – An Afternoon and An Evening!)

So this is not going to be a deep or profound post, I just want to share what one morning in our life is like here. We awake usually around 7-7:30 with no alarm - just whenever the sunlight starts creeping in our windows. I carefully look at the floor before stepping out of the bottom bunk because I have found giant millipedes and baby lizards roaming in the wee morning hours. Jaxon likes to catch them, although sadly he pulled off the wiggling tail of the baby lizard this morning. The tail flipped and flopped like a fish out of water, but the lizard seemed no worse for the wear as he scurried off under my bed. If Jax is still asleep when I awake, I’ll write a little or I’ll roll out my yoga mat and stretch, breathe and sit for a bit to get my head and body clear.

When Jaxon wakes up it is time for breakfast! He is a hungry, growing boy. Usually we have cereal, toast, maybe yogurt and fruit, coffee and juice. We went to the grocery store last night and here is what 15000 Colones or about $30 will by you in Sarapiqui – Choco Crisps cereal, milk, small heavy whipping cream (for my coffee!), 2 avocados, 3 bananas, 2 yogurt smoothies, 2 yogurts, a giant carrot as big around as my wrist, Oreo cookie wafers, a roll of cheese crackers, bakery bread sticks, a bag organic sesame logs, a small can of peas, one pack of microwave cheese popcorn and a 6-pack of Imperial beer (Costa Rican). I think that is it. Groceries are surprisingly expensive here! We fix our own breakfast and dinner, but lunch is included.

Then we go and check in at the main lodge to see if there is any work for us to do. Yesterday we went to a local school while Sergio gave a presentation on the rainforest. The day before, we took a GPS through the forest and mapped points to help design a topographic map. In a few minutes we leave again for two more schools. (I need to hurry and get dressed, so will wrap this up!)

The kids are extremely rambunctious as this is their last week of school. You can smell the anticipation of the holidays in the air. All of the tico houses are already decorated for Christmas with lights, garlands and even tiny snowmen – so funny since they probably have no idea what those white, round men really are they never get snow here. And the porches have little decorated Christmas trees. (75% of Costa Ricans are Catholic.) The children finish their school year this week and return in February to a new grade, so for them, this is their summer holiday about to start. Yeah – 3 months of freedom!

They do not celebrate Thanksgiving, so not turkey and stuffing for us this year. However, my new American friend Stephanie and I are going to cook a Costa Rican style Thanksgiving on Saturday. I can’t wait to report on that!

I will post some pictures of our room and some “roommates” when we return from the schools.

Here is a slideshow of some of the wildlife we have seen during our first week here in Tirimbina.

After the Boots, the Umbrellas

Not every moment is an adventure, but that is what it is like to live in another place, as opposed to just taking a vacation and staying in a  hotel. I am trying to explain this to Jaxon. We do not have the resources to raft, zip line and play all day for 30 days straight. There may be some boring moments, but then we rest up for the more exciting times ahead. We are here first as volunteers and as tourists second.


The volunteering has been humorous thus far. I had really expected that Jaxon and I would be doing some important research and helping out scientifically, but honestly there is little for us to do here. They are finding small tasks I think just to keep us busy. Yesterday we scrubbed the communal umbrellas. The day before that we scrubbed 50 pairs of stinky, rubber rain boots. (They said the boot area never looked so good!)

But we are finding pleasure in very simple moments here. Even in washing boots and umbrellas. Even though these tasks seem totally futile, we still we do them without complaining. (Well, Jaxon did a little bit.) But we played and laughed at the silliness of "our volunteer work." It is somewhat like the Buddhist idea,'"After the dishes, there are still dishes." You just do each task with mindfullness and when it is complete, you move on to the next thing. I like this from Thich Nhat Hanh, which illustrates this idea a little better:

Bathing a New Buddha

To my mind, the idea that doing the dishes is unpleasant can occur only when you are not doing them. Once you are standing in front of the sink with your sleeves rolled up and your hands in warm water, it really is not so bad. I enjoy taking my time with each dish, being fully aware of the dish, the water, and each movement of my hands. I know that if I hurry in order to go and have a cup of tea, the time will be unpleasant and not worth living. That would be a pity, for each minute, each second of life is a miracle. The dishes themselves and the fact that I am here washing them are miracles! Each bowl I wash, each poem I compose, each time I invite a bell to sound is a miracle, each has exactly the same value. One day, while washing a bowl, I felt that my movements were as sacred and respectful as bathing a newborn Buddha. If he were to read this, that newborn Buddha would certainly be happy for me, and not at all insulted at being compared with a bowl.

Each thought, each action in the sunlight of awareness becomes sacred. In this light, no boundary exists between the sacred and the profane. I must confess it takes me a bit longer to do the dishes, but I live fully in every moment, and I am happy. Washing the dishes is at the same time a means and an end that is, not only do we do the dishes in order to have clean dishes, we also do the dishes just to do the dishes, to live fully in each moment while washing them.

If I am incapable of washing dishes joyfully, if I want to finish them quickly so I can go and have a cup of tea, I will be equally incapable of drinking the tea joyfully. With the cup in my hands I will be thinking about what to do next, and the fragrance and the flavor of the tea, together with the pleasure of drinking it, will be lost. I will always be dragged into the future, never able to live in the present moment.

I think this is an important lesson for Jaxon. When he complained and even I admitted that it was kind of stupid, we still did it and were able to make it fun. I told him that we are here to help and even if we do not think what they are asking of us has value, that we are still to do it and then we move on to the next thing - like an amazing hour in the rainforest resplendent with brilliant blue butterflies, green snakes and yellow birds. Not every moment is going to be that exciting, yet every moment has meaning and can be pleasurable if you just remember to LIVE in it. It's the time spent washing the boots and umbrellas that gives us a way to measure our time in the forest.

Another simple pleasure is that every day after lunch (which is the same EVERY day!), we get a helado (ice cream) and go sit on the hammocks together and watch the wildlife. This has become our ritual and I look forward to that 20 minutes every day.

Life is beautiful in the simple moments. It doesn't have to be all bungee jumping and Class VI rapids. This is what we are discovering here.

Late at Night...

It's late and the rain is falling on the tin roof. Jaxon is asleep in the bunk next to me and life is good here in Tirimbina despite the fact that the fridge has frozen all our drinks and the milk comes out on our morning Zucaritas (Frosted Flakes) in a giant white ice clump. Despite the fact that I never want to see frioles negras y arroz when we return to the States, yet it is the only thing I can eat with certainty that I know what it is. Despite the fact that I have no more clean underwear or socks and the washing machines are full and no one really seems in any hurry to empty them (they've been full all day with sheets and there are about 8 more bags of sheets sitting back there!) Despite the fact that I saw FIVE poisonous snakes on two different hikes today! Despite the fact that my mattress feels like a cement slab and the sheets have a thread count of 6. Despite all this, life is good.

Highlight of my day: This afternoon I had a solitary moment shared only with with one startlingly beautiful green hermit (which is similar to a large hummingbird with a long curved beak). As I was photographing a moth, something zoomed by my head. This brilliant flash of green then stopped a foot in front of my nose on the suspension bridge and fanned open his tail feathers and stared me in the eyes.  For about 3 seconds time was suspended on a suspension bridge as this bird appeared suspended in midair. Amazing moment. (Sidebar - Holy crap - something just chirped VERY loudly in our room and it is pitch black. I think we are not alone! Sounds like a bird. Hope it is not a bat or a  giant bug. I am a little bit nervous! I am shining my headlamp around the room but see nothing! OMG!)

I think I better try to go to bed now!

A Night of Latin Creole Dancing

Tonight Jaxon and I went to visit my new friend Stephanie in town. She and her husband (who is a Tico) own a small gym in town. She said that few people exercise here, but she and her husband are trying to bring a healthier way of life to this very (and I mean VERY) rural village. We took a dance class with a guy who was teaching us some type of Creole Latin - even better than Zumba! Jaxon was playing on all the exercise machines while we laughed and danced. Many people showed up with their kids and in their jeans to watch and work out. It was very small gym and people were just coming and going. It was so much fun. I was wearing a black tank top, bright red capri pants and purple Tevas. NICE gym attire!

Today our volunteering consisted of scrubbing 50 pairs of old rubber boots to get ready for the Tirimbina open house on Sunday. Afterward I smelled like sweaty feet and rubber. Tomorrow we wash umbrellas. Fun. At least they have something for us to do here. I kinda thought we'd be helping out with science projects and such, but with our limited Spanish I am afraid we are not that helpful. At least we can do some manual labor! I wanted Jaxon to feel like he was working at least a little bit!

On a lighter note, we experienced an earthquake today  - 5.0 (got to face one of my BIG fears), saw half a dozen white faced cappuchin monkeys, 2 howler monkeys and 2 agoutis on our hike.  Fantastic! Too bad the camera batteries died! Also I bought Tang at the grocery store in the following flavors:, watermelon, lime, guanabana, gamaica (hibiscus, I think.) And some cookies called "Yippys" which are supposed to be all the rage in Costa Rica but were really kind of nasty. I bet I will eat them anyway since they are covered in chocolate!

Earthquake! (PG-13)

So, I was sitting in our room downloading Skype to call my mom and the room began to quake. It scared the living $h!+ out of me! We put on our flip flops and briskly walked to the main hall. An American science teacher who lives here and teaches at an International school reassured us that it was just a tremor (REALLY!) and that there are over 10,000 of them a day in California. He said it is a good thing because it releases energy so that a big one does not occur. I have felt a sensation of dizziness since I have arrived here. I feel for sure that I am sensitive to the earth's movement and that I am feeling small shifts beneath me often- a little unnerving. It feels like I am on a boat. Anyway, we are ok. Apparently the epicenter was in San Jose. The rain is again softly falling and there is laughter coming from the restaurant. All is well in Tirimbina.

 This afternoon we are going to visit a American friend in town and to her dance class at the local gym  - she and her ex-pro soccer player husband, Carlos run it. We befriended her on the bus to Sarapiqui and I think we are both looking forward to some American camaraderie. Jax is looking forward to meeting her dogs and having popcorn. Amazing the things you miss in less than a week!

Pura vida!

Enjoy a slideshow from our first walk in the rainforest. More to come!

Here is our visit to the Tirimbina Rainforest Chocolate Tour!

Random shots at bus depot and Tirimbina

We've Arrived!

Well, after many long hours we have finally arrived. A couple funny things happened - we landed in Houston with only ten minutes to get from the B terminal to the International terminal. I was freaking out that we were going to miss our connection. So, I am running and dragging Jaxon and pushing old ladies off the moving sidewalk to get to our flight. I muscle my way to the front of the line and arrive at the counter frantic with my hair flying out from my ponytail, bags dragging at 9:13 for a 9:10 flight. I frantically implore in a loud manner, "Is the plane still here?" The well-coiffed, plumped and pampered attendant snubs her nose and me and says, "Of course. We still have an hour before boarding." Duh....can you say Central Time Zone? Oops - forgot about the time change! I had to avert my eyes when the little old ladies that I pushed out of the way moments earlier, plopped down in a huff in the seats beside me.

Second, Jaxon's backpack did not arrive at the airport. Well, that's not really funny, but we are trying not to worry about it. Jaxon has no clothes and I have no make up (I know...I brought make up to the rain forest. Sad, but true.) Guess we will both feel naked if the bag remains lost. So instead of heading on to our destination in the forest today, we are at a quaint, funky little hotel Called Hotel Aranjuez. Costs $37 and includes a great breakfast and some fine coffee! Tomorrow we head to Tirimbina! (Must say thanks to the kind ex-pat and took Jax and I under his wing and helped us get acclimated in our hotel and around San Jose.)

I also successfully Skyped my mom from Jaxon's iPod Touch. That thing is amazing! I have got to get one of those. Why is it that our kids have all the cool gadgets and gear and we don't have squat?

Hasta manana, mis amigos. Buenas noches y que duermas bien!

PS - Had hoped to load some photos, but am having technical difficulty.

Just thought you'd all like to know, it is 11:08pm, my flight leaves at 6:30 am, and there is still nothing in my backpack. And here I am posting it publicly instead of packing. WTH is wrong with me? Had a great dinner tonight with some of "my girls." Just wanted to shout out that I love ya'll!!! Thanks for a fun farewell, and I hope I remember to pack my underwear. And the 9 packs of gum that I bought here because I know they won't have the gum with cardamom in Costa Rica.

Less than 24 hours

In less than 24 hours Jaxon and I will make landfall in Costa Rica. OMG! What am I doing? Am I crazy?! My mother thinks I am. She is still trying to convince me to change my plans and go somewhere that is safer (translate - Camden). I am nervous, but also so excited. I cannot believe our departure time is almost here. I still haven't packed!

FYI, all you worry worts out there (You know who you are!), Costa Rica is very safe. In fact, it is dubbed the "Little Switzerland of Central America." It has no standing army and none of the strife her neighboring countries have had. The ticos (Costa Rican natives) are very friendly and honest people (so I've read - but we'll know more in less than 24 hours!) The only things to watch in Costa Rica are some it's toxic amphibious inhabitants, Traveler's diarhhea (why can I not spell that word!), crazy drivers and natural disasters (i.e. - earthquakes, mudslides, volcanoes, etc.). Not too much to worry about. Shwew.

I really am not worried though, because I am traveling with my Uncle Angelo's spirit watching over us on our trip. He passed away yesterday after a very long illness. He was an amazing man and always bestowed upon me a father's love after my own father (his brother) died when I was 15. My uncle's infectious laughter and smile will be with us through our adventures. I will carry his courage and vivacious spirit with me. I know that he and my dad will be smiling down upon us, keeping us safe. Rest in Peace Uncle Angelo. You will be missed....

Facing Fears Quote

Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be fearless in facing them.

Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain but for the heart to conquer it.

Let me not look for allies in life's battlefield but to my own strength.

Let me not crave in anxious fear to be saved, but hope for the patience to win
my freedom.

Grant me that I may not be a coward, feeling your mercy in my success alone;
but let me find the grasp of your hand in my failure.

Rabindranath Tagore (1861 - 1941)

I just returned from an invigorating 6 am yoga class while vacationing here in Myrtle Beach and the wonderful instructor, Dawn, read the above quote which plucked at my soul this morning. The past few days I have had to face fears locally that I thought were awaiting me abroad. It was the perfect reminder for me to not live in a state of anxiety and fear, but to face fears if and as they arise, with strength and courage.

As many of you know I am planning a month long volunteering trip to Costa Rica with Jaxon. This is part of a greater project I have titled: Project Compassion Jaxon We are still finalizing the details of our volunteerism, but so far I think we will be spending time at Tirimbina Rainforest Center and and the Wildlife Rescue Center. My first plans were to go to the Nicoya Peninsula but I was discouraged by a response I received to a vacation rental inquiry. I contacted a woman who rents a darling tico home in Montezuma and here is the the email she sent back to me:

"As you are bringing a child for a long visit, are you aware that this area is long overdue for a major earthquake? They are expecting at any time a quake of 7.5 or greater which will cause major damage. There is also the threat of landslides, and a post-quake tsunami in this low-lying region. I don't mean to scare you away, but since you have a child who depends on you, you should have this information so you can make prudent decisions. The newspaper (La Nación) has told us the probability of a major quake in the near future is 100%. It is inevitable. Also, the center you are looking at has some of its facilities in the mountains, which will not be safe during a major quake due to landslides and falling trees."

Hmmm, wonder why that was not mentioned anywhere in her travel brochure!?!

After that I was warned by others that Costa Rica is a third world country and we could be robbed or kidnapped. AND there are sharks in the water there. AND crocodiles in the rivers. AND did you know that Costa Rica is home to 135 species of snakes and 12 species of deadly vipers, including the Bushmaster which can strike from a distance of 6 feet with multiple bite strikes. AND did you know they closed the schools in Costa Rica due to swine flu. Plus you can get malaria in the Limon region. Okay, so, at this point I was ready to completely scrap our dreams and stay safely tucked away in my bed right here in little ole Camden, South Cackalacky.

Imagine my surprise this past Saturday when I learned there was a 3.5 earthquake right here in SC. And then I learned of the tragic shooting death of a young man in my safe hometown of Camden. And on the beach that afternoon, we were whistled out of the water because of sharks. Yes, sharks! I even saw a fin! And the first swine-flu related death has occurred in the Midlands and one Midlands doctor suggests this is "the calm before the storm." Apparently, there is as much to fear in our own backyard as there is in a third world country. Which by the way, did you know that Costa Ricans report the highest life satisfaction in the world? I don't think Costa Ricans spend that much time living in fear. The United States snagged the 114th spot out of 143. Swell.

So, what is there to really fear? You can spend your whole life living in fear of the unknown, which is wasting a lot of precious energy that could be used to better yourself and the world. How about we spend our lives LIVING fearlessly instead? If we stay aware and in tune to the changes around us, we can face any adversity with courage. Maybe then Americans could bump up their life satisfaction rating!

Here is one tip for living more fearlessly. Throw away your television. Turn of the internet. And tune out the fire and brimstone doom and gloomers. Fear is about control. And those who spread fear are seeking to control you. Believe me, if the world is coming to an end, your friends will tell you. And why do you want to know anyway? Wouldn't you rather live in blissful ignorance right up until the final meteroic impact?

One way to let go of fears is to stop listening to the hype!! The media, the government and even some religious leaders thrive (and prosper!) from keeping you in fear. Keep this in mind the next time you start a sentence with, "I'm afraid..." Or when you pass judgment on others or admit to racial profiling, recognize that these fallacies and are against humanity and compassion and are instead fear-based. Think about from where these fears stemmed and take control of your life. Stop living in fear.

Jaxon and I are headed out to live la vida dulce in Costa Rica for a month this Fall. No, we ain't skeered! If you want to turn it to some news of our adventures, follow us here on our blog.

I'd love to hear what some of your fears are and how you have overcome them. If you are still working on the overcoming part, send them anyway. Admitting them is the first step to overcoming!

JACKPOT! Creative financing for the trip!

About a month ago, I bought airline tickets to Costa Rica on a whim. Jax and I were looking for our first out of country volunteer adventure and he was adamant that it be in a rain forest. So a few Google search and Sidestep hits later, and Costa Rica it was. Destination - a go. Details (like funding) - uhhhh.... still a bit vague. Until today!

But thanks to groovy little options like "Bill Me Later" you can have up to 90 days to figure out how to pay for things which are way out of your current league (like month long trips to Central America), so I figured, what's the risk? There are approximately 30 Powerball opportunities before the first payment is due, so I am confident that we'll make it somehow.

Today, I hit the jackpot. (and no it wasn't Powerball - duh it's Thursday!) So, how did I do it?

Background: I do believe in putting out a positive vibe. And I also believe in tapping in to the everflowing Prosperity River that always snakes and winds within our reach just like the path in CandyLand. Oh yes - it is out there! Usually located about 2 milimeters above your extended fingertips, flowing directly over your head. We just choose to stay stuck in the Molasses Swamp of mortgage payments, the Gooey Gumdrops of credit card debt, or in my case - the obscene and ever dark Lollipop Forest of vet bills! Jump a little higher, *believe*, and take a dip!

Anyway, I knew that I would get the money to fund this trip. I just knew and I trusted.

Honestly, I am not one of those cheesy, "You just have to believe!" kind of people. I don't just believe you can, "Think yourself thin," or "Pray for a cure!" or "Imagine your perfect mate right into your life!" That's a bunch of self-help mumbo jumbo, which, by the way is a multi-billion dollar business praying upon the lazy and the hopeless.

Real change takes effort. But positive thoughts can go a long way to instigate change. I do believe that it is possible to visualize something and that visualization can become a reality. That is not to say that a whole rotten, stinkin' slew of unpleasant things I DID NOT visualize have already happened, because they have, (like stomach flu and squashed road squirrel), but there is a mysterious power to prayer and belief that I think can help to shape your reality. I got the proof today.

Still reading? Good, this has a cool ending. I'm gettin' there.

So, I get a call from the City of Camden (SC). It appears an error had been made with my utility bill and am being credited a refund of close to $2000! Cha-ching! Ironically, my high utilities were one of the reasons I closed my yoga studio in the first place, which is what gave me the freedom to plan a month long trip to Costa Rica with my son. Seredipitous? Fortuitous? Small town utility f-ups? You decide!

Me? I am right now believing in those Powerball numbers! And jumping up like a Gingerbread Pawn with open palms to the Prosperity River!

Woo hoo! We have the cash to get Project Compassion Jaxon in action!